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RADIANTBABY'S CREATIVE JOURNAL
Punishment, Part 1/1 
12th-Aug-2008 09:41 am
DW -- john smith -- kissyface
Title: Punishment
Author: radiantbaby
Characters/Pairings: John Smith/Martha [implied Ten/Martha]
Word Count: 984 [in Microsoft Word]
Genre: Angsty smut, [very] dark!fic
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Non-con, kink [spanking, caning]
Spoilers: S3’s Human Nature/Family of Blood
Summary: What if at the core of the Doctor's personality is this 'dark being' that we only see in glimpses, and, out of shame, he [in the guise of the “Doctor” persona] usually keeps that darker side hidden? And what if the mask started to slip and that darker half slipped from the subconscious into consciousness and acted on his desires? The Doctor wanted Martha, John Smith wanted Martha, but both of them pushed their feelings down, and we know what happens when you push your feelings down -- they eventually bob up to the surface and, in this case, they pulled something darker along with it.
Beta: None
Disclaimer: All your Doctor Who are belong to us Sadly, I own nothing related to Doctor Who et al. I am just playing around in their sandbox for a bit of fun.
Author Notes: I’m organizing my hard drive and decided to post several of the fics I’ve written for the kinkmeme publicly [so, you’ll probably see more fics over the next few days]. This one in particular was originally written back in June [for the prompt: “Martha/John Smith, non con or reluctance”]. I really can't believe I wrote a non-con story and this one must have come out of the deep, dark recesses of my brain as it even makes me somewhat uncomfortable. Still, I tried to make it sound pretty, as disturbing as it was. There is no beta for this fic as it’s been sitting on the net for a while now. I tried to find any typos that I could, but I might have missed some. Oh, and feedback is happy-making, so please leave a word or two [even if I am a bit slack in responding, your comments always make my day].



====

He’s punishing her.

Tea spilt on the floor, papers too awry on his desk, too much dust lurking in corners – all things that serve as his excuses for her punishment. They are all lies, of course, or at least things that are not as significant as he’s painting them, but they work for his needs.

The truth is too hard to admit, even to himself.

Her dress is pulled up to her hips as she bends over his desk, exposing the luscious curve and swell of her bottom, now dotted with red welts from his violent hands and brutal swipes from his cane. With each strike, she had called out, so he ordered her to quiet herself, told her things would be so much worse if she didn’t stay silent.

He had not yet thought on what that might mean.

No, groaning and grunting coming room his study late at night was bound to raise a few eyebrows from the staff – especially when it involved his loyal maid, Ms. Martha Jones.

With his final blow, she broke the silence, a strangled and strident cry escaping her lips as her back arched upward and her fingers grasped tightly to the sides of the desk. He had warned her, told her things would be worse if she’d made a sound, and that is all he tried to focus on as he pressed one palm hard against her lower back, pushed her legs further apart with one knee, and reached down with his free hand between her legs.

“I warned you, Ms. Jones. I told you to stay quiet,” he growled, shoving a finger hard into her wetness.

Her evident arousal caused his cock to throb, already achingly hard from the muffled cries he’d heard from her as he’d beaten her, already hard from all the times he’d thought of –

He shut his eyes tightly against his unwanted thoughts, trying to ignore the rush of feelings in his limbs as his mind drifted to all the many times he’d wanted her – wanted to touch her skin, kiss her, make her his.

No, he needed to punish her.

He couldn’t let himself succumb to such desires for someone in his service, especially someone who, with such beautiful dark skin stretched across their precious bones, would cause controversy that would shake the very foundations of the school they were in.

No, he needed to punish her for making him feel this way – making him want, making him desire and ache and writhe in the bed night after night with his cock tightly in his fist and his mind only on her…

He pulled harshly at his trousers, zip and button practically ripped out of their stitching to free his arousal. “Stay quiet, Ms. Jones,” he commanded.

His palm on her back was pressing her tight and flat against the desk as he replaced his finger with his cock, sliding all the way in quickly, unceremoniously, as her wet muscles accepted his length. She moaned, a tone that sounded lost somewhere between protest and pleasure, and whispered, “Please, no. I beg you. No.”

“I said to stay quiet, Ms. Jones,” he said, louder this time, starting to move against her from behind, his hip bones smacking hard against her thighs and the bruised flesh of her bottom. “You brought this on yourself. Had you only just behaved -- ”

He could feel his scrotum already begin to tighten, desire coiling tight like a spring within his belly, and his legs began to tremble. Not yet, not yet, not yet, not yet, he urged himself, not wanting things to end now that he’d finally taken them too far, bumping up against the mental boundaries that pitted gentleman versus savage beast in his responses and actions.

He knew she was crying suddenly, her chest heaving against the grain of the desk, and he wanted to stop himself – show compassion, mercy, love – but he couldn’t. It was wrong, wrong, wrong to feel this way and she was wrong, wrong, wrong to let him – make him – feel this way about her.

He had never imagined it being this way with her though, wishing more for innocent dances, holding hands, and secret kisses in shadows, but a spark had ignited inside him, a dangerous spark – something so very deep in his core that it felt like him, but not him, like the man that haunts his dreams, that hides in the darkness and calls himself a doctor – no, The Doctor.

This Doctor wanted her as well, he thinks, as he feels something much like him pushing to the surface, insinuating himself in each and every cell of John Smith’s body, moving beneath his skin like the blood in his veins. This Doctor had always watched Martha slip through fingertips, dust from stars in space scattered eternal, and he wanted her for himself.

John cried out softly, biting his lip against mental protests -- no, she’s mine, she’s mine, she’s mine, she’s mine -- fighting for leverage within his own mind as his climax took him, leaving him pressed tight against his conquest.

The bright light that had flashed before his eyes as he shuddered and shook in orgasm, eased back into darkness and he opened his eyes to see Martha bent before him, the rise and fall of her deep breaths shifting the muscles of her back. The coil of desire that had been hot in his belly had sprung, but was now replaced with an empty sadness and guilt. His mind also sprung back just as quickly and he looked down at what he’d done, horrified.

He needed to punish her for making him feel this way, pulling monsters to the surface of his flesh and bones, but now all he wanted to do was punish himself.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” he said, but the words felt as if they weren’t truly his.
Comments 
12th-Aug-2008 01:58 pm (UTC)
This is *excellent*! I can just see this happening, actually... Although not on the screen, obviously!


Love your new header, too!
12th-Aug-2008 02:25 pm (UTC)
Oddly, I can see it happening as well -- especially in the case of a very repressed!John Smith coupled with a repressed!Ten underneath.

Love your new header, too!

Thanks! It took forever the other day to change the look of this journal, but I am very happy with it. I just need to change the mood theme once justben uploads the pics to our server.
12th-Aug-2008 02:28 pm (UTC)
Oddly, I can see it happening as well -- especially in the case of a very repressed!John Smith coupled with a repressed!Ten underneath.

Yes!

Thanks! It took forever the other day to change the look of this journal, but I am very happy with it. I just need to change the mood theme once justben uploads the pics to our server.

I look forward to seeing it...
12th-Aug-2008 01:58 pm (UTC)
I love this fic so so much. You can't imagine. It's the fic that gave me my new, shiny dark!John Smith/Martha kink, for real. I love dark fic.

Bless the kinkmeme (though I don't think I can come out with the one I've written, ha ha, teh mystery).

Edited at 2008-08-12 01:59 pm (UTC)
12th-Aug-2008 02:30 pm (UTC)
I love this fic so so much. You can't imagine. It's the fic that gave me my new, shiny dark!John Smith/Martha kink, for real. I love dark fic.

Wow, I am so honored you like my fic so much. You are one of favoritist writers in fandom (which reminds me that I am woefully behind on "Our Velocity" and really need to catch up), so the fact that you read and liked one of my fic makes me feel all warm and squishy! Yay!

Bless the kinkmeme (though I don't think I can come out with the one I've written, ha ha, teh mystery).

Dun, dun, dun! Oh well, I am sure it's quite a good one. :)
12th-Aug-2008 02:35 pm (UTC)
aw, thank you. i remember reading this and going "damn, who wrote this?". hee. how awesome.

I actually wrote two fics for the meme. One I don't mind coming out about too much -it's a Ten/Jenny. But the other one shames me too much. Luckily it's a pairing no one would think I'm able to write. But that's the fun about anon memes, right? You let your hair down.
12th-Aug-2008 02:43 pm (UTC)
I have two Ten/Jenny fics and a Jenny/Luke fic that I will be posting over the next day or so that I posted to the kinkmeme. The Ten/Jenny ones embarrass me a bit, but they were naughty to write.

As for the pairing no one would think you would be able to write -- I felt that way about the Ten/Belle du Jour fic I wrote as I am not too keen on the Ten/Rose pairing in general (and it referenced that a lot -- essentially Ten was using Belle as a substitute for Rose). Still, it was an interesting challenge.

That's the best thing about the kinkmeme that I've found -- it's great for challenging you as a writer. :)
12th-Aug-2008 02:48 pm (UTC)
Really? Ten/Jenny is so so awesome. And okay, my only knowledge of Jenny is watching the last 15 minutes of "the doctor's daughter" but whatever, I say it's awesome.

Oh, man, Ten/Belle du jour, oh noes. XD

I started writing one alt!Ten/Rose as a kind of hate!ficcing for how little I like Ten/Rose but I got bored, lol. I need to write more Ten/Jenny for reals. And people needs to prompt more Ten/alt!Ten, that too.
12th-Aug-2008 03:16 pm (UTC)
I like Ten/Jenny, but it often freaks people out because of the whole incest angle. For me, it just doesn't feel like it would necessarily be a taboo for Gallifreyans, especially as there seemed to be much less women than men so I'm sure they got with whomever they could to propegate the species. Plus, I think they look really hot together.

Oh, man, Ten/Belle du jour, oh noes. XD

Yeah, I only wrote it because it totally hits my kink where someone uses someone else (usually a prostitute) sexually as a substitute for someone else they want instead (this has been a reoccuring theme in my fic for about 15 years now). I also like angsty!Ten.

I just finished an alt!Ten/Rose fic for the bluesuit_fic ficathon, but otherwise it's not a pairing I am particularly drawn to (though I do quite like the potential of alt!Ten in general).

Ten/alt!Ten is totally awesome though and sadly not written about enough (usually they only show up in threesomes with Rose). I probably should write one myself sometime.

Edited at 2008-08-12 03:17 pm (UTC)
12th-Aug-2008 03:36 pm (UTC)
I guess what appeals me about Ten/Jenny is precisely the incest angle. I am a sucker for incest pairings. I was a fan of incest pairings way before it became cool STUPID SUPERNATURAL FANDOM. I should have an icon with that.

I only wrote it because it totally hits my kink where someone uses someone else (usually a prostitute) sexually as a substitute for someone else they want instead

GOD I HAVE THAT KINK, TOO. (It normally creeps up in my fics as well, like the Jack/Martha pr0n, and some parts of the Master/Martha). I didn't know I had that kink until Queer as Folk US presented it, rather graphically.

I like alt!Ten/Rose a bazillion times better than Ten/Rose, it's much more interesting, how they are two strangers suddenly forced to act as if they were in love cause it's supposed to be so. My problem is that I can't imagine any situation where Tennant and Billie Piper could have the slightest sexual chemistry so the interest in the pairing is limited by how much "ew" the actors together provoke in me.

That's why I'm trying to write my way around the bluesuit_fic prompt so that I don't have to write alt!Ten/Rose. mainly because writing Rose tires me so. I have to work real hard to get invested in her, cause no matter what my feelings are for Rose I don't want to do her injustice in fic. I'm not that kind of Rose hater, I like to think my fics with Rose don't sound revengeful or anything.
12th-Aug-2008 04:12 pm (UTC)
I should have an icon with that.

You should -- I think that is a great idea! :)

GOD I HAVE THAT KINK, TOO.

I don't feel so alone then! I can't help it, it just turns me on intellectually and well as erotically for some reason. Perhaps its the dark and angsty element inherent in it.

I like alt!Ten/Rose a bazillion times better than Ten/Rose, it's much more interesting, how they are two strangers suddenly forced to act as if they were in love cause it's supposed to be so.

Yes! I love that about them -- it makes them so interesting on so many levels. I'm amazed at all the fluff fic I am seeing about them in fandom because if any pairing is about angst and such, they are definitely one of them.

My problem is that I can't imagine any situation where Tennant and Billie Piper could have the slightest sexual chemistry so the interest in the pairing is limited by how much "ew" the actors together provoke in me.

Wow, I thought I was the only person who sees no sexual chemistry between Tennant and Piper (I see friend chemistry, but that's it -- I think in a way that contributes to part of why I never bought into Ten/Rose). I was starting to think I might be crazy.

As for the bluesuit_fic story I'm doing, it's only slightly alt!Ten/Rose as they are finding themselves incompatible (well, in the broader scope of things alt!Ten is finding himself incompatible with his life there, full stop). There are some romantic feelings there, but I kept that mostly in the background. Like you, the last thing I wanted to do was Rose-bash in my story. I suppose she's not entirely pleasant in my story, but I did my best to not come off as OOC for her.
12th-Aug-2008 02:06 pm (UTC)
Oh my! That was so...hot. Loved it!

I love your header BTW.
12th-Aug-2008 02:35 pm (UTC)
Oh my! That was so...hot. Loved it!

Thanks so much! I am so happy that you enjoyed it! :)

I love your header BTW

Thanks! It's still new and shiny to me, so I keep staring at it like a total dork myself! :)
12th-Aug-2008 02:39 pm (UTC)
It's Ten & Martha...how could you NOT stare at it?!
12th-Aug-2008 02:44 pm (UTC)
Very good point!
12th-Aug-2008 02:28 pm (UTC)
I love this.

Bless the kinkmeme!
12th-Aug-2008 02:38 pm (UTC)
I love this.

Yay! I'm so glad! :)

Bless the kinkmeme!

Yes, bless the kinkmeme! If anything for prompting me out of my fanfic comfort zone to write tons of things I wouldn't write otherwise. I still have three more fics to post that I wrote there, so it should be interesting to see the reaction to them.
12th-Aug-2008 03:18 pm (UTC)
Oh geez.
I loved it! I can never write kink fic but I sure can read it, haha
12th-Aug-2008 03:21 pm (UTC)
Thanks! I'm so glad you enjoyed it! :)
12th-Aug-2008 03:28 pm (UTC)
Dude.

Excellent kink.

So good, in fact, that I'm now going to go read your other fics.
(adding you to my flist too btw)
12th-Aug-2008 03:42 pm (UTC)
Dude.

Excellent kink.


Thanks!

So good, in fact, that I'm now going to go read your other fics.

Great! I hope you like them! They are rarely kinky (though I do write a lot of smut) and range from fluff to angst, but hopefully you'll find some others that you enjoy.

That reminds me, I really need to update the fic masterlist. I'll try and do that today as I've written several fics since I last updated it.

(adding you to my flist too btw)

Cool! :)
12th-Aug-2008 03:32 pm (UTC) - Repressed Feelings
Ooo...nice! The Doctor has been repressing his feelings for ages now...it makes sense that he's got a darkness inside him that could pop out when his controlling persona is set aside.

Poor Martha, the subject of his love as well as his passions... I have to admit I was hoping there would be more of this to see what happens next. ;D
12th-Aug-2008 03:52 pm (UTC) - Re: Repressed Feelings
Ooo...nice!

Thanks so much! :)

The Doctor has been repressing his feelings for ages now...it makes sense that he's got a darkness inside him that could pop out when his controlling persona is set aside.

It makes sense to me too (and is sort of fanon in my head, honestly). I mean, he's pretty broken, but I can only imagine how bad things would be if he wasn't there to control himself -- especially with a more passive personality like the HN/FoB John Smith at the helm.

Poor Martha, the subject of his love as well as his passions...

Yeah, I know. I felt really bad for putting her in that situation. I mean she wanted the Doctor (and probably, by extension, John Smith), but not in such a brutal way.

I have to admit I was hoping there would be more of this to see what happens next. ;D

Other people have asked for a sequel and I am considering it. I am not sure where I would go with it though. Maybe I'll give it some thought. Any suggestions?
12th-Aug-2008 04:23 pm (UTC) - Re: Repressed Feelings
Well you know me and my love of angst, so there's always what happens when the Doctor gets control again and realizes what he did...

Or if you wanted to continue the kink, there's always Martha putting the clues together about the conflicting darkness within the John Smith/Doctor and 'helping' them both achieve catharsis by domming from the bottom and working him through it.
12th-Aug-2008 05:25 pm (UTC) - Re: Repressed Feelings
Hmm, both sound like really good ideas actually!

I love the idea of Martha topping from the bottom to help John Smith/Ten, but I also like the idea of post-John Smith!Ten remembering what he did after the fact. I'll have to think on that and see where the inspiration strikes most.

Thanks for the ideas! I'll credit you if I use either of them. :)
12th-Aug-2008 05:49 pm (UTC) - Re: Repressed Feelings
My pleasure! :D
12th-Aug-2008 04:14 pm (UTC)
Very good! I can see this being true so easily. Ten is so repressed in his feeling and 1913 is represive place for sexual feeling and feelings for any person below the soials class and skin color.
12th-Aug-2008 05:07 pm (UTC)
Thanks!

Yeah, I thought it was definitely something that could have happened -- which is a bit creepy, but not that surprising considering the circumstances.

P.S. By the way, did you get my email? :)
12th-Aug-2008 06:50 pm (UTC)
I can't even begin to tell you how this brightened my day. Such a lovely dark fic... and just a hint bittersweet as well.

I love how John Smith is trying to justify his actions by saying it's all Martha's fault. Classic denial. That just appeals to me for some reason. I always knew that Martha was a sultry minx, even when she's not trying to be! ;)

Wonderful job!
13th-Aug-2008 03:04 pm (UTC)
I can't even begin to tell you how this brightened my day. Such a lovely dark fic... and just a hint bittersweet as well.

Thanks! I am glad that I could have such a great effect on your day! :)

I love how John Smith is trying to justify his actions by saying it's all Martha's fault. Classic denial. That just appeals to me for some reason.

Yes, it is very interesting -- especially from a psychological standpoint.

I always knew that Martha was a sultry minx, even when she's not trying to be! ;)

LOL, yeah. Poor thing though -- I'm sure this was not the way she wanted to have sex with John Smith/Ten for the first time!
12th-Aug-2008 08:16 pm (UTC)
One of my all-time favorite John Smith/Martha Jones fics. Glad this made it over from the kinkmeme to your fic journal. :)

Oh - and I love the journal redesign btw.
13th-Aug-2008 03:13 pm (UTC)
One of my all-time favorite John Smith/Martha Jones fics. Glad this made it over from the kinkmeme to your fic journal. :)

Thanks so much! I am so glad that you liked it! I was afraid the content would send everyone running to the hills!

Oh - and I love the journal redesign btw.

Thanks! It took forever to do [I'd never personalized a journal before, so I was basically teaching myself as I went], but I am really happy with the result! :)
13th-Aug-2008 06:18 pm (UTC)
I was afraid the content would send everyone running to the hills!

Oh no, not at all. I think it's interesting to see the conflicting sides of the Doctor, and to get to see what happens when the darker side of him is unleashed on someone.
12th-Aug-2008 09:04 pm (UTC)
Wow!! Welcome to the dark side!!!
I love it. You're on fire. I love every single fic you've written. Looking forward to the next one.
13th-Aug-2008 03:16 pm (UTC)
Thanks so much!

I am so flattered that you enjoyed both this and my other fics -- that really makes my day! :)
14th-Aug-2008 04:21 am (UTC)
You are soooooooo welcome. Nothing but admiration for your writing style. U R from the ATL????
(Deleted comment)
13th-Aug-2008 03:18 pm (UTC)
Thanks! I'm so glad that you enjoyed it! :)

P.S. Oooh, pretty Hamlet pic. That's my favorite pic from that series. I currently have it on my wallpaper.
13th-Aug-2008 03:39 am (UTC)
Oh, this is fantastically dark and wonderful. Excellent job!
13th-Aug-2008 03:30 pm (UTC)
Thanks so much!
13th-Aug-2008 06:34 am (UTC)
It took a lot of courage to plumb these depths, but the result was worth it. Well done.
13th-Aug-2008 03:31 pm (UTC)
Thanks so much! I am so glad that you liked it! :)
13th-Aug-2008 11:01 am (UTC)
Love the ending!
Very good Fic. This is what I saw happening as well.
Looking forward to the ten/jenny pairing!
13th-Aug-2008 03:38 pm (UTC)
Love the ending!
Very good Fic. This is what I saw happening as well.


Thanks! I'm so glad that you enjoyed it!

I couldn't resist the ending -- that is so Ten slipping through the cracks there, with his mantra "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry".

Looking forward to the ten/jenny pairing!

Great! I posted both of my stories tonight, I hope that you like them! :)
13th-Aug-2008 12:35 pm (UTC) - It's strange...
Anonymous
I started coming to this site for the avatars. I'm going to have to catch up on these stories.
13th-Aug-2008 03:40 pm (UTC) - Re: It's strange...
I hope you enjoy the stories! :)
18th-Aug-2008 01:34 am (UTC)
Oh dear sweet LORD, this was brilliant!
This Doctor had always watched Martha slip through fingertips, dust from stars in space scattered eternal, and he wanted her for himself.

Beautiful line!

John cried out softly, biting his lip against mental protests -- no, she’s mine, she’s mine, she’s mine, she’s mine -- fighting for leverage within his own mind as his climax took him, leaving him pressed tight against his conquest.

I felt so sorry for John Smith and the Doctor with that line.
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